So drunk its hurt
Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
I just found out that my father was a Human condom for halloween when I was 4. And to think I used to wonder where my sense of humor came from.
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
Everyone is slow dancing to Aerosmith. I am serenading a slice of pizza.
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
Randomize
