Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
As your boss, I feel obligated to tell you that turning our management meeting into a kegger may just be the best idea you've given me yet.
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
And you will no longer be getting a thank you note from my vagina
I think he's speaking German to me now
Nevermind, he's just drunk and not texting properly
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
I just set my mike's hard down and didn't want it to spill, so I held my finger up and told it to shoosh. I'm drunk.
I'm both gender and math confused
Randomize
