He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
Randomize
