Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
Am I really in your phone as Asshole Jesus??
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
Come back. Shots need mouths.
Apparently this establishment won't let you rent a sailboat if you have been drinking rum all morning
Like, bro, how do you think I got the idea to go sailing
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
Randomize
