We can smell you smoking weed from downstairs and your little brother is asking why the upstairs smells like gasoline. Please smoke in the basement. XOXO dad.
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
I feel like when purchasing hard liquor on a Monday I also need to buy a happy 21st bday card to not seem so pathetic
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
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