I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
Dude, can't find my socks anywhere....
Yeah, you took a shit in the harbor off a wall, used them to wipe. I'm sure they're still on the beach somewhere if you really want them back
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
Please don't be alarmed by the blood on my arms and phone in the morning. It's not mine.
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
Randomize