Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
He won't talk to me. He'll only communicate using scissors
I just found puke in my bra..
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part.
The moment you ate chicken nuggets out of your purse you were my hero.
Where the hell did i get chicken nuggets from
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
Randomize