Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
Hey guys. This is Daniel texting on mayas phone. if she called you and told you that i made her have sex with me in my doghouse with my dog present that wasn't true.... so dont spread that.
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
I've only been home four days and my parents' cleaning lady already wrote down the number to AA and told me she's praying for me.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
I was just like oh sorry I'm peeling meanwhile my legs are on either side of his head and I look like a fucking Komodo dragon
I have enough bourbon in me to put Justin's cat in the dishwasher.
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
He couldn't undo my bra. He ended up breaking the clasp he clawed at it so long. We met on Tinder for God sake
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
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