like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
im in DESPERATE NEED OF A COMPANION RIGHT NOW I’M MOTHER FUCKING TRIPPING SOLID GOLD BALLS
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
Randomize
