Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
So i closed my laptop as i started to fall off my bed and then i caught myself and realized that moment of catching myself is the difference between tuesday and friday.
I'm lonelier than Tom Hanks in Cast Away, right meow. Ready to make this bong my Wilson.
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
N I'm drinking this invention I call "do-it-fluid" I had a bottle of vodka that was 3/4th empty, so I put in 1/4th rum, 1/4th tequila, 1/4th whisky... it's definitely the worst idea ever..
So hungover. I'm getting too old for trolloping around in disco shorts going shot for shot with well behaved underclassmen in an effort to lure them to the dark side of alcoholism and liver failure.
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
reminiscing on last night: why the fuck did I feel the need to stand on chairs everytime we took a jello shot?
Randomize