i woke up with my moms heels on underneath your couch cushions
you want 1 or 2 eggos?
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
You’re sleeping on my couch so you’re not making dick appointments tonight
I share a birthday weekend with Easter this year, so that fucking sucks. I hate sharing...and I have to share with fucking Jesus this year.\n
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