do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
Why is there a living, breathing cow on your front porch?
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
Apparently I joined a band last night. Definitely my favorite blackout.
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
What a dumb baby whore.
Just cleaned someone else's sperm off of my bedroom wall. Never throwing a house party again.
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
Stop calling my penis "Fat Jesus"
hot take: drunk me can walk through walls?
Randomize
