Yea I just took my 1st pregnancy test. Turns out I am just fat. Also I haven't been with anyone in 3 months, which is clearly making me crazy.
I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
Randomize
