I feel like if im whacking off more now that i have a gf than i did when i was single, somethings wrong.
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
I knew it was a bad night when the only thing I could remember was you force feeding me tortilla chips as I hugged the tire of my car and begged to have my stomach pumped.
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
I AM A GOOD PERSON AND THEREFORE I DESERVE QUALITY DICK!
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
It's a lot harder to work after sex than it is to work drunk... just saying.
Why would you call when you knew I'd be having sex!?
Why would you answer?
Randomize
