I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
He keeps asking me for girl advice, i told him im an expert at getting drunk, not girls
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
I'm sorry that throwing up fish and Jamaican Rum in the back of your dad's car ruined our friendship
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
You grabbed my arm, said "I need you" in a very concerned voice and dragged me to the other room where you were blasting Evolution of Beyoncé.
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
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