The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
News Flash: Turtles are cuter than Jesus.
Congrats on damning at least 10 generations of your offspring to hell with just one text message. Way to start your morning off right.
so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
In the middle of fucking me, she said "Hold on, I need my Hulk hands."
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
Cancel that soberness update. I just almost fell down in the security line
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
Randomize
