so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
you're out of your mind
you look like daphne blake and he looks like fozzie bear
it's like he rubbed a lamp and wished you into existence
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!
Randomize
