her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
Mmmm, vodka for breakfast
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
Is it because I queefed?
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
Also, they sell weed-chocolate covered strawberries. For the romantic stoner.
That was one of the best texts I got today
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
Randomize
