What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
She announced her abortion via fbk
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
buying my parents vodka for Christmas is like buying a normal person socks.
So on a scale of 1 to Friendship-Over, how mad would you be if a rando I brought home sharted on the shag carpet in the living room?
We knew we were dealing with a pro when some random guy at the bar thew you over his shoulder and you still didn't spill your drink
Strangely enough, that's not the first time that's happened
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
Randomize
