I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
i woke up next to a ladle and a packet of chocolate biscuits that my face had melted into one giant biscuit.
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
Sharing a bathroom with a guy sucks. I always have to set an alarm for the middle of the night just so I can take a dump. Poop text btw
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
We just won 1800 at the casino and are going to the strip club. Who gives a fuck if it's 5pm
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
Randomize
