i just woke up in a strange room and the first thing i saw was a chewbacca mask... wtf
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
Hiking for a first date sounded like a good idea in theory because there was absolutely no possibility of me blacking out. In practice, I'd rather black out than go through what I just went through.
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
Well, I hope you're having fun. I'm just gonna lay here and wait for death - shouldn't be long now.
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
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