How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
Admittedly shitfaced... I have two questions. 1)why is the fan in my bathroom on? (Sub-text: is there a ghost?). 2) is your underwear really argyle?
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
Randomize
