Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
I never want a future conversation of ours to include the words "quart of semen" in it
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
I didn't just randomly come up with it. But if you want to give me extra credit for creativity I have a bare chest and chocolate sauce left
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
I just woke up ass naked on top of all my sheets, with no blinds in my room because i used them as togas, my back is killing me, im covered in sharpie, i have no memory of last night, and im pretty sure im still drunk. I consider the night a success
Hey can you explain why there's a dissected coconut in my purse????
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
Randomize