did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
I bought a dress specifically for face plant durability... this is how serious I am about my drunk status this weekend
Speaking of roommates, Kelsey and I woke up to urine in our trash can. Neither one of us is willing to admit to it so we've come to the conclusion that someone snuck into our room in the middle of the night
We simultaneously blacked out then simultaneously came to then simultaneously had sex with the neighbors. We're definitely meant to be roommates.
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
I just remembered that I did shots out of a gay mans crotch. And there's someone saved in my phone as "Miranda knows where my car is"
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
I just gave myself a foot massage. #SingleAsFuck
Randomize