Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
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