He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
Just fucked a hooker at a motel in New Jersey. Two states down, 48 to go.
Dude I just heard my boss singing from the bathroom "I love making poop"
I cut my penus on the lid.
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
My goal for tonight: make tomorrow as awkward as humanly possible.
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
Bro if you don't text me back I'm gonna send you a picture of my nut sack every ten seconds for the rest of the night. I'm home alone with nothing to do. Don't push me.
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
We probably are going to die. So. Thanks for agreeing to be my Maid of Honor even though I torture you.
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
Randomize
