No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
in the middle of sex he stopped to tell me that he loved me... then slapped my ass and told me "back to business"... im gonna marry him
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
she always made me post sex PB&Js it was like fucking a trashier Martha Stewart
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
You are my best friend, but sometimes best friends need to punch each other in the face
There is a midget driving a powered tricycle around town. I am not drunk, stoned, or lying.
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
Okay she just told me to turn the volume down on the fan. What does this even mean?
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
Randomize
