That's intense
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
I never want a future conversation of ours to include the words "quart of semen" in it
you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
Apparently as she was dragging me out of the club, I was clinching onto this european guy screaming at Jenna: that's the 12th time you've cockblocked me tonight
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
Randomize