i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
I really don't want to get drunk alone tonight. Like, I'll do it, but I won't enjoy it.
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
Randomize
