what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
I can't tell if I'm hungover or if my cat just knocked the lamp on my face
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
I just realized I slept with a guy who used the pickup line "do you have a bandaid? I skinned my knee when I fell for you."
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
So... I sharted on the plane. It was hard to maintain my composure and acted offended at the same time. I hate you for not cutting me off last night.
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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