doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
Currently cooking 3lbs of bacon in case the power goes out bc if even one slice of bacon goes to waste then sandy wins
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
Did I really drink that whole bottle of Jack Daniels last night?
Heroically.
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
when my phone is in portrait view you can just assume i've been watching porn. that's the only thing i want to see in full view.
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
Randomize