I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
You were laying in bed whispering and crying to the half eaten burrito saying "why am I shitting so much" and "what did I do to deserve this"
I got carried out by security last night. AND the taxi had to drive up onto the sidewalk to get me i was that drunk.
Is it bad I'm drunk at orientation
You've been there for 12 hours, what are you supposed to be doing
Not be drunk
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
You’re going to be a doctor, and I’m going to be a trophy wife. We both have goals
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