how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
Words i added to my t9 today: gnomes, facebook, and chlamydia.
I woke up this morning to 4 booty call texts. So i am trying to find the sign that says i like to sit on cocks so that i can take it off.
trust me, i wonder where that sign is on a daily basis.
Fuck men. I'm going to go eat a package of cookie dough and get fat. I hope I die of salmonella.
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
For Valentine's Day I've purchased six lighters and I'm decorating them for him. I'm on a full ride to an art school and this is what I'm using my talents for. An intervention is needed. Please stop letting me date stoners.
Actually it's really just going to be me drunk in your living room swinging from a pole on a tuesday morning.
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
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