I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
Haha, just learned changing others iPhone passcodes is fun while drunk but not fun the next morning.
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
Why the hell did you invite him? He's gonna bring two more inches of dick and zero fun.
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
Look I'm really high right now, and if I were to leave this house, it would be for the sole purpose of getting an ice cream sandwich. So can you please just do it.
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
He is farting the alphabet right now. In the goddamned restaurant. You don't get to recommend men anymore. Or restaurants for that matter.
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
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