I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
I got a job at a micro-brewery. Now who made the bigger mistake, them or me?
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
I'd bet your vomit would be flammable at this point. Can I try to light it?
We wouldn't be friends if you didn't.
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
Do you remember me making bird noises at the bartender with some guy at the bar last night?
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
Randomize
