My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
It's a beautiful day for a hangover
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
Just found the cutest bag of coke under my bed. I'm going to get fucked up and bleach the cat vomit out of my sheets.
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
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