As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
Randomize
