You were parading around the bar chugging girls drinks and then asking them if you could buy them a drink. It was actually genius
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
When I wake up, please remind me why my shoe is in the toilet, my shower is filled with jello, and there is a naked girl sleeping on my coffee table holding a bag of Cheetos. that is all.
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
I saved a sauce packet from taco bell that said "Free me" to use in my next break up.
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
Randomize
