My brain says no but my pants say off.
While sitting in bed naked eating ramen and watching the colbert report I realize why random sex happens.
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
im watching shaqs comedy special. this is how i know im not sober.
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
My third nipple is alarmingly under-appreciated.
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
Fuck you know you drunk when you start signing the Masson impossjvke song to entourage yourself to pee
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
When I woke up I had 6 missed calls making sure I was ok and asking if I remember showing my tits to a picture of her baby.
Randomize
