Literal conversation "you are ________ ____. you facebook friended me"
I'm gonna answer everything she says with 'cum on da face' until she breaks up with me...great idea or greatest idea?
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
I just conducted a skype meeting drunk and in the middle of a cornfield. I don't even think they noticed.
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
Randomize