i have a new swear word: supercalifuckaliciousexpialadamnit
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
This is the LAST time i'm accepting the excuse "tequila made me do it". Even tequila thinks buying all of nickelback's itunes singles is fucking retarded
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
I woke up with my left arm looking like it got mauled by a lion. Oo and she said someone broke her car window.
Just realized these events may be related.
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
You started pulling out condoms from your fanny pack and threw them at all the couples on the beach
I just want to drink bourbon and have sex and then eat like, a Christmas cookie.
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
Randomize
