I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
As I am reading this. I'm standing in my underwear eating taquitos. I'm saying this in the most loving way possible: FUCK OFF.
Eating pizza and drinking wine while I watch the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. The wine is for reducing the pain of falling asleep with more insecurities than what I woke up with.
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
You need to somehow incorporate the phrase "these hoes ain't loyal" into your best man speech.
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
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