K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
he met me at the airport with a welcome home sign with a grilled cheese, PBR and a blow job on it. i missed america.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
My mom is wine drunk and on painkillers. As invigorating as that conversation was, it was also a dark glimpse into my future
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
How do I stop your cat from bathing me? I'm afraid she'll get drunk off my sweat
Randomize