but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
Mom wants to know why I'm bringing a blender back to college.... didn't have the heart to tell her she's paying a $20,000 tuition for us to make margaritas and sleep through class
so he just called his new girlfriend by my name and she was too drunk to even notice how awkward..
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
Are you saying being a wizard and going to hogwarts wouldn't be life changing, believe in magic you fucking muggle
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
I'm about to do something based solely on the fact that a fortune cookie told me to. This may not end well.
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