if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
I'm pouring my heart out in these texts and you're going around showing everyone???
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
My head weighs 7 pounds. i know this because i spent the majority of the night passed out in the bathroom, using the scale as a pillow.
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
I have seriously seen way too may DIY cut off jean booty shorts and half shirts on fat girls this summer. Fuck you Pinterest.
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
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