Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
I'm masturbating to football. This is why I get guys and you don't
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
A guy with no shirt on and a eyepatch just got out of the car beside me. After he slammed his door into mine. This is our hometown.
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
The cop let me finish my J before he cuffed me. Coolest arresting officer ever.
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
Yeah everywhere i go i feel like a 3rd or 5th or (2n+1)th wheel. That's right, i'm a mathematically depressed drunk.
When he busted out the ketchup I got the hell out of there. It got really creepy really fast.
Randomize