Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
When you're looking for your panties tomorrow, you traded them for a blunt on the train.
You asked the bartender if she was trying to get you drunk. She cut you off after that.
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
After I chugged my beer the cop slapped my ass and said "atta girl" this can't be real life.
Randomize
