Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
Apparently 'check out this motherfucker' is not an appropriate greeting to use in the vicinity of sitting united states senators. Who knew
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
I think the highlight of my night is when I was eating a mayonnaise sandwich. drunk me was on point.
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
Randomize
