Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
We should see who can shotgun a beer faster over iPhone FaceTime
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
She kept saying 'I love you' but i couldn't tell if she was talking to me or to her beer.
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
Because of my cut offs, my brother is convinced I fucked a girl so hard she forgot to take her pants. Fairly accurate.
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
I just want to drink cheap wine and throw my bra at an aging singer songwriter
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
Randomize
