Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
Im sorry i offered the man at mcdonalds your hand in marriage in exchange for some french fries
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
I'm eating Doritos at 9am because last nights weed is just now starting to wear off
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
Twas still the Saturday before Christmas \nAnd it’s still fucking snowing\nAnd Steve wished he slowed down \nOn all the fucking drinking
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
Randomize
