you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
i just farted in a meeting....took me completely by surprise.
so you made the shocked face and they caught you.
yup.
I was eating her out when she coughed, I just swallowed a bright red blood clot
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
Be still, my beating vagina.
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
Randomize
