You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
Seriously. Destroy her vagina. Do it like an angry baboon mating with a gentle manatee.
There is a half eaten corn dog and soy sauce on the counter... WTF did you eat last night??
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
Im just a social blackout drinker.
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
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